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To Kill a Kelpie


The small vessel leaped playfully amongst the waves as Sheila held on tightly to the mast, closed her eyes and let her imagination run freely. Normally, the Loch Ness waters were calm but today its commotion was brought about by a brisk eastern wind. The young lady on deck was far from being fearful but rather she indulged her feelings towards the intention that she was finally alone with no one to disturb her in any way, shape or form. No cell phone, no television and above all no doorbell.

As she was enjoying her long-awaited solitude, she was rudely interrupted by a knocking sound and a mysterious voice shouting an assortment of obscenities. What could that be she pondered silently? Turning her head slightly but still maintaining a firm grip on the mast she could see a rough, shaggy looking gentleman boarding her boat.

“Hurry it up woman, get this tub under tow.” He shouted to her. “There’s no time to lose.”

Not understanding what he was talking about she questioned his authority on her boat stressing the words “her boat” as she addressed the elderly man. Taking a second look at him she could see clearly that his hair and beard were as white as the foam on the sea waves.

“What do you want,” she curtly questioned.

“I told you woman get this tub moving, it’s coming now.” Again, his voice had a tone of urgency in it. Feeling this lunatic would surely do her harm if he did not get his way, she immediately started the engine as he had directed.

“There, asshole,” she shouted. “Are you happy now?”

Setting her course towards the nearest land mass she gazed behind her. She could see nothing unusual in the water especially anything that would present a danger to them.

“I see nothing,” she growled at the old man. “There is nothing there at all.”

“Oh yes, its there, trust me,” the man said firmly. “That creature in the water behind us is not human. Least not any you have seen the likes of. You see young lass, that creature is a Kelpie or a water horse. This legendary spirit can change its shape to human form at will. You like literature,” the man quizzed her.

“As a matter of fact, I do,” came her reply in a sarcastic manner.

“That’s good because Robert Burns associated this creature with the devil when he wrote his poem entitled Address to the Devil. The kelpie can be found in just about any sizeable body of water in these here parts. Those people who rented you this boat knew about this creature and should have warned you.”

All Sheila could do is gawk at the man in total disbelief as he talked.

“First off I don’t believe in Loch Ness Monsters,” she injected and then quickly added, “Are we in any kind of danger with this kelpie?”

“Actually yes,” the old man replied. “These water demons’ prey on any human that it encounters. What we have to do is kill this beast before it kills us.”

“And just how do we manage to do that,” she snapped back at the man.

“All the myths which I have heard describe the kelpie as a solitary creature therefore if we kill this one we will be safe, for now anyway. Kelpie’s possess the inapt ability to transform themselves into non-horse forms which includes human appearance. When a kelpie transforms to human form they usually always appear as a male. There was one case where the creature was seen in Loch Lomond area and overpowered and drowned a man and a young boy after jumping out of the stream.”

“I recall hearing about that several years ago.” said Sheila.

“Yep, it killed them alright, killed them both. ‘Another time it adopted the guise of a wise ole man who continually cursed to himself. As the creature was resting on a bridge stitching a pair of jeans a passerby recognized it and struck it squarely on its head.”

“Did it kill him,” she asked.

“No, but it did cause it to revert back to its horse form and quickly scampered back into the nearby local pond. In yet another account the kelpie in human form appeared as a rough, shaggy gentleman, who leaped behind a solitary person, strongly gripped them and slowly crushed the life from the man while tearing him to pieces and devouring his body.”

“Oh my,” said Sheila. “So, what can we do about this water demon?”

“Well first,” said the old man, “we got to make our way to shore as quickly as we can. I see your heading there now. Go faster mate go faster. We’ll be safe there. On land we can find a gun and a silver bullet. Yeah, just as silver kills the werewolf of folk legend it also will kill the kelpie.”

No sooner had he said this than she increased her speed towards the closest land. Sheila’s tension rose the closer she got to land. She watched ahead hoping to avoid any rocky locations but noticed the mysterious stranger must have jumped overboard perhaps in haste to get ashore and find a weapon. The small craft finally came to rest upon the edge of the shoreline. She glanced around but saw no sign of the old man. She quickly leaped from the boat and onto the land. On land she looked up and noticed a beautiful white horse.

“And now young girl,” the horse balked, “I am hungry.”

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My name is Joseph Parish. I am also known as "Word Writer", a freelance writer who specializes in a host of subjects from survival and emergency actions to gardening. Over the years, I have found that many people involved in the subject of survival claim an attraction towards the subject they practice. A few of them have really meant it. Fewer still have put their life into it and shown their true feelings about the subject. I attended the American Public University, specializing in Emergency Management and Terrorism. I have written one book on terrorism entitled “The Mind of a Terrorist”, and it is available on Amazon. I was brought up in southern New Jersey and attended school in the Millville area, graduating from the Millville Senor High school in 1966. By the time I graduated, I was hooked upon entering the United States Air Force. I was determined to enter the military and pursue a field of study in the area of electronics. I initially attended a course in Aircraft Radio Repair at Kessler Air Force Base in Mississippi. Later, I was trained as a Ground Radio Repairman. Little did I realize that this course of training would eventually lead him into the Forward Air Control Career field. I remained in the military for 21 years, at which time I visited many foreign countries as well as just about all 50 states in America. In 1987, I decided that it was time to get out of the military and retire from active duty. It was at this time that I made a quantum career leap; combining my, military electronics training with my love of Aircraft, I became employed by TRW Aerospace in Redondo Beach California. The company was involved in developing and manufacturing various space craft units and satellites for the government. I will readily admit that the company was one of the greatest places I had ever worked, and really hated to leave the company, but I decided to depart the area. I have developed many interesting and cherished friendships while learning survival techniques, particularly those that dealt with earthquakes. Unfortunately, the area was not the best place to bring up children in and upon the conclusion of my contract with TRW, I returned to the east coast. Upon my return to the New Jersey area, I began teaching school for several years. I generally taught Junior High subjects, such as science and math. After getting involved in the teaching of young minds, I was informed that a close relative in Florida was ill and required help. Without hesitation, I headed to the sunshine state to assist. While in Florida I was employed as an RF Amplifier Engineer. Eventually the crisis which had brought me to Florida was over, and I was once again heading back up north, only this time to the state of Delaware. Here I worked as a mainframe computer operator for a major chicken producer until I decided that it was time for me to permanently retire. I decided to take a slightly different route. I was attracted to the topic of survival because of my love for the military and my field of work while I was active duty. When 9-11 took place in America, there was a rise in the popularity of survival preparations which led to both government and private citizens being concerned about survival. These people and agencies had the freedom to select the various topics relating to the subject and the followers began to flock to them because of their knowledge and values. By the end of 2007, various internet websites began cropping up relating to survival. One such website was mine. Being a part-time newspaper reporter in New Jersey years ago, I would create my own form of written articles. My first exposure to "survival" came as an Air Force Forward Air Controller (ROMAD) during my 21 years in the military. I have served as a unit Safety NCO, Emergency Preparedness NCO and other related duties. Some of my safety related articles had been published in the Air Force Safety Manual. Over the years I have taken courses ranging from FEMA sponsor classes to “Aircraft aviation” courses in my efforts to become more informed on survival techniques and procedures. I am a firm believer that you must be ready for any sort of emergency and above all you simply cannot rely upon the government to help you during times of crisis. I am a follower of the philosophy that you should continue to learn as much as you possibly can and believe that when you stop learning you are simply dead. I am currently an active volunteer in the Delaware Medical Reserve Corp, participating in the Delaware Bat Monitoring Program and the Terrapin Rescue. I previously was a Red Cross volunteer working with the Emergency Management Section of the organization. My hobby is gardening and I have my own greenhouse. I love experimenting with the propagation of plants. Many of my articles center around the topic of gardening. I look forward to accepting assignments from potential clients. Feel free to contact me at (302) 404-5976.


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